Embrace it, but don’t let it overtake you. You know that saying, “Love what you do,” well it's great, but, it’s got a dark side too. You love it, you are driven by it, you want to share it, and see it become everything that you feel it's meant to be. It can drive you crazy, yet love it all at the same time.
I’ve spent the better part of the last 23 years being passionate, creative, and a visionary person. It came easy, I would feel it, see it all, and try to cognitively understand. I could never explain it because it was something that I couldn't really put to words. Most recently, in the last 13 years, it showed up as linking music, dance, and fitness to create feelings for humans and provide a platform for feeling and healing.
The emotions are so strong. The feelings and intuition that come are intense. It feels like an elevated understanding of love and truth while connecting with something bigger than all of us.
That’s what I love the most. That feeling!
The songs are messages that I want everyone to feel and hear. I feel guided to lead from emotions, allowing it to feel fun, fiery and freeing. The lyrical sea and the beats of the songs make the emotions submerge in ways I don’t even understand. The flow and guidance move through me in sequences and patterns that make the emotions felt intensely. Sometimes it’s rage, sometimes it’s the heart healing, sometimes it's just good loving fun. It’s healing mainly, yet can be so dark at the same time. In that darkness there is light and in light we can find a new way. *(I keep tell myself).
This year, I felt like I was being suffocated and silenced. Like a holding back of something that humans actually needed. Not being able to share this passion in the ways I was driven to share feels horrible. Trying to accept what is happening has not been easy as the passion and desires to share swirl though my body and mind. Slowly watching the world around me struggle, knowing that just one opportunity to share this could change so much for so many. With the feeling of crying hope inside me, I try to send messaging through music and movement for everyone to feel, "courage to change", "it's ok not to be ok", "Higher love", "Fearless", "Never gonna be the same".
Sharing this in person was a ripple of magic. A ripple that I want back so badly!
It is the passion I have within me to share, to help, to allow people to feel and heal.
That same magic held back, feels dark and hard to accept.
The dark side of not sharing your passion = suffocating and heartbreaking to watch dreams unfulfilled that were once so full.
The lightness and passion that I feel when I lead pulls me from my own darkness. My own creation continues to heal and help myself and many on an ongoing basis. I will keep moving forward in whichever way I can to help humans everywhere, feel and find their truth.
I leave you with this,
Live loudly, but be gentle with yourself.
Connect, connect, connect.
Heal and grow.
Breath & move towards your way home.